Home at last, but it feels very stressing...

Tonight we sat down to a dinner of Chilis with the grandparents, mom and my aunt and uncle and cousin. It almost felt like being back in time with family again and remembering stories from the past. It's always good to bring these memories back in the mind of my grandma who is forgetting a lot lately. It's sad how life has changed in the last 7 years... Going from 18 and being totally ready to leave home and go to college, to losing my dad, to moving home, to going to school near home, to moving out and in with my friend, to losing our friendship, to moving into my own apartment, to watching my mom get sick, to now being finished with all my UCF classes and awaiting my internship.. I'm not a big fan of change and the unknown so it's hard for me to be happy the whole college thing is coming to an end but yet I'm happy to as this semester I kept telling myself that I was soooooooooo over school...

The future is so uncertain with my family's health, finding a job, moving home or where ever and trying to figure out how to deal with mom's sickness. It's got me very agitated and upset these last few weeks. It seems like somedays its just better to give up hope. I want to cry and say why? why me? why her? I hate how time is just passing so quickly by....